Back to work......

Many of you know that started back to work last week. UGH! I had to leave my precious baby boy in the hands of other individuals so his mommy can take care of other people's kids all day, sometimes I liken my high school teaching job to a glorified babysitter...... yes, on many occasions my high school students are not much better behaved than my 3 month old, but there's just something different about it when it's your own kid.

The first day that I went to work I made Will drop him off, he is staying at my aunts right now and while that is definiately better than going to a day care, it is (was) still very hard and I was fighting back the tears as I left bright and early last Monday morning. My aunt emails me several times through out the day though to check in about what they are doing that day. I am still looking for somewhere for him to go from February to May, and then since my wonderful job allows me summers off I will get to stay at home with him all summer! I can't wait.

Going back to work I had definite mixed emotions. A part of me was ready to get back to normal life and get back into my routine. That feeling however, made me feel bad for wanting to leave my baby. Then there were times when I was at home that I would feel bored, but I would not be bored enough to want to go back to work. What's so boring about wathing a new baby sleep the day away? It's rather relaxing and they are only little once. I always asked my sister how come she never stayed at home with her kids, and she would respond, "I feel like I'm a better mom, when I don't stay home with them all day." I never understood this statement until I had a kid of my own. I sum it up like this, when you stay at home with them all day, you almost take for granted the little things that they do, and their little looks, and little coos. When you are away from them all day and get precious few hours at home with them you hang on every moment and can not wait to get home to be with them.........